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Pursue You - Original Worship Song - EMMJr
Here's a new song I wrote yesterday which came to fruition quickly, so I recorded it. It's entitled, "Pursue You". It is meant for congregational worship, but it stands ok alone as well as soaking music. (Background music used to soak in the presence of God.) Some who know me, know that I had an about-face spiritually last June that was years in the making. I've been a Christian for 22 years, but last June I felt like I got to know God in a brand spankin' new way by coming to the end of my ways and embracing Him more fully. He brought me out of a frustrating and depressing ten year period in which I longed so deeply for Him, but on my terms. Coming to the end of my stubbornness, and confessing to him (at an outside Northgate Alaska meeting) that my way hadn't worked no matter how bad I wanted it to, brought me to a place where I became so very aware of His amazing presence and felt truly born again - again. It is a daily thing now - I MUST have more of this God, this Jesus! This experience last year was my Damascus Road experience like where Saul became Paul. More accurately, I feel now more than ever like the harlot who cried on Jesus' feet and wiped them with her tears - I AM SO THANKFUL FOR HIS FORGIVENESS AND AM NOTHING WITHOUT HIM! He has touched my heart so deeply that I often find myself in tears when thinking about his goodness. I am truly wrecked for God now and never want to go back to my old life. I wanted to be a son to God for years, but felt more like a wooden boy - like Pinocchio (without the lying nose). I was aware of my sonship in my mind for years as well as my Christian authority, but my heart was not reserved for God the way He desired it to be - my heart was far from him. I led worship at 4 different churches and was even on staff at one as an intern pastor, but I did not know him - at least not compared to now. I have discovered him to be way better than I ever thought he was and now know him as Father. Now I understand the truth of the fact that we will seek him and find him when we search for him with our whole heart. He has laid up trillions of dollars worth of faith in each of us, but will only release it portion by portion as we are made ready and make ourselves ready for it. He literally hides himself (word) in our hearts, eagerly desiring to make himself known to each of us when we are ready. Don't wait years being frustrated with depression like I did. Depression is real, but God is bigger - way bigger.